Enjoy our team's carefully selected dirty jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest dirty jokes with your friends!
You look great in that outfit, but I bet you’d look even better in your birthday suit.
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How is sex like a game of bridge?
If you have a great hand, you don’t need a partner.
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Knock! Knock!
“Who’s there?”
“Ice cream.”
“Ice cream, who?”
“Ice cream all night if you’re lucky.”
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A man went to the doctor because he was having problems with premature ejaculation.
“Try surprising yourself when you feel like you’re about to ejaculate,” the doctor said.
That following day, the man went to the store, purchased a starter gun, and dashed home to his wife.
That night, the two were making love and ended up in position 69.
The man felt the need to ejaculate and pulled out the starting pistol.
The next day, he returned to the doctor, who inquired about his progress.
The man answered, “Not well. When I fired the pistol, my wife pooped on my face, bit three inches off my manhood, and my neighbor came out of the closet with his hands in the air.”
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You’re so sexy, my zipper is falling for you.
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What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?
If we don’t get some support, people will think we’re nuts.
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After all these years, how do Santa Claus and Mrs. Claus keep the marriage fresh?
Toys.
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“Do you know who is coming to our party later on?”
“Yeah, Dee is.”
“Dee, who?”
“DEEZ NUTS!“
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I’ve been feeling a little lifeless lately—would you give me mouth-to-mouth?
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If a man talks dirty to a woman, that’s sexual harassment.
If a woman talks dirty to a man, that’ll be $6.50 a minute.
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